Madison:  Hello, Mr. Bettis.  First of all, let me say that I’m a big fan.  I think you’re one of the all-time great running backs to play in the NFL, and I was really pulling for you to win a Super Bowl when you were playing for the Steelers.  You were a great, tough player.  The reason I came over here, though, was to compliment your beard.  I really wanted to tell you that your beard is always neatly trimmed and clean-looking.  It’s perfectly shaped and you should have a lot of pride walking around with such a well-groomed beard.  So, Bus, you know, I just wanted to come over and tell you that I’ve always thought you’ve had a great beard and to keep up the good work.  It really is a fantastic beard.

Bettis: Man, you better get the fuck up out my face before you get knocked out.

FIN