Actually, it may be better. I didn’t think much of this rant when I started watching, but once Bruce gets rolling it’s really pretty funny. It’s as if the Indians W-L record is what keeps the world in balance. Anyway, he reminds me a bit of Lewis Black, but where Lewis Black fakes his anger for the sake of performance, Bruce might actually kill someone or himself.
Meet Jenny Fletcher… A model/triathlete. In other words, an ideal female specimen. In other words, a dream girl to marry. In other words, well, just view the pics….
One of the more “under the radar” cheering squads of the NFL has got to be the Jets Flight Crew. Not only are they attractive but think about it. Most of these girls are either New York City or Long Island girls. And that means that most of them party and most of them drink…a lot.
And this weekend the team was looking for another whole bunch of hopefuls to be part of that long standing tradition of doing splits and getting wasted after games. Yes, the first round of auditions for the crew were held over this past weekend.
The results? A few overweight girls but mostly hot chicks who could get their feet over their heads.
Pictures after the jump
Shit like this has to be a joke. If it’s a joke it’s still funny. If it’s real, it’s really funny. If only it was at Gold’s Gym.. Either way, today’s lesson is don’t run in sandals and a huge clothe kids.
In: NFL
It was really just a matter of time, right?
ALAMEDA, Calif. — The Oakland Raiders released former No. 1 overall pick JaMarcus Russell on Thursday, ending a three-year tenure marked by his high salary and unproductive play on the field.
Senior executive John Herrera told The Associated Press about the move and said that “we wish him well.”
The decision came less than two weeks after Oakland acquired Jason Campbell from Washington to take over at quarterback and signifies that owner Al Davis finally lost patience with the immensely talented but unproductive player he drafted first overall in 2007 against the wishes of former coach Lane Kiffin.
The Raiders ended up paying this guy over $39 million to overthrow open receivers and chuck bounce passes to tight ends. It’s gotta suck to sack up and cut the guy, admitting to the entire world you were wrong, but it’s also the right thing to do. Will any teams take a flyer on Russell? It’s hard to imagine – if you can’t play for the Raiders, who can you play for? – but I also wouldn’t be shocked if a team took him on as a 3rd stringer or something. I wish him well, too, but the NFL is no place for quarterbacks who got by on sheer athleticism in college.
Also, I know at least 4 guys named JaMarcus. I think that’s the name of the cantor at my synagogue.
[ESPN.com]
This is going to get thrown out of court, right?
MIAMI — Adding to an already contentious divorce battle, Dwyane Wade’s estranged wife has filed a lawsuit, claiming his relationship with actress Gabrielle Union is causing her and the star Miami Heat guard’s two sons emotional distress.
…
The lawsuit alleges Union “engaged in sexual foreplay” in front of the boys, which “severely inflicted the Plaintiffs emotionally and mentally.” It also claims that the boys received “medium size gifts” from Dwyane Wade for Christmas last year, while Union got “the biggest gift of all.”
“Defendant has played sexually explicit roles, including roles as a seductress,” the lawsuit reads. “Defendant has apparently decided to take her role beyond the films and into the home of a married man, Dwyane Wade, in the presence of his two minor children.”
Um, I’m not a lawyer, but…oh, wait a minute. Fuck. I am. And, uh, there’s really no cause of action for getting medium sized gifts when others get big gifts. Well, not yet anyway. I’m sure there will be if Obama keeps getting his way.
What? You don’t like the Obama joke? Ah well, I thought it was better than the obvious one about Dwyane giving his girlfriend “the biggest gift of all.” My poor girlfriend, like Wade’s estranged wife, is stuck with medium sized gifts. Sorry babe, I’ll keep jelqing.
[ESPN.com]
I don’t know how this guy can be so calm, because I’d be scared out of my mind. I honestly don’t know whether I’d rather have tea with Tyson or with a real Bengal tiger. I think the same rules apply in either situation: no sudden movements, no loud noises, and avoid eye contact at all costs. Eh, I think I’d rather go with the tiger, for the unrelenting fear that Tyson would take anything I said – no matter how innocent – and take it as me patronizing him, and then beat the ever-loving shit out of me. If I was lucky. Tiger all the way.
Happy belated Cinco de Mayo! Did everyone get their Tequila and Tacos on yesterday? I sure hope so. I was sitting here doing absolutely nothing different than I would normally do. But that didn’t mean I wasn’t thinking about you, the loyal Unathletic fans who were sucking down Coronas and eating Tostitos thinking you were good Mexicans for one day.
I did however manage to conjure up some photos of cheerleaders from the Mexican baseball leagues. It’s nice to know that scouts in the Major Leagues who have to go to crappy places to find talent can at least watch these lovely ladies at games.
Pictures after the jump
