All I can say is keep a close eye on Andy Reid around your ex-wife, because chances are he’ll make a move and proposition her. If not her, then he’ll probably go after your quarterback instead.
Believe it or not, in 2002 Donovan McNabb went down with an ankle injury and Andy Reid thought that it was the perfect opportunity for Troy Aikmen to come out of retirement and play for the Eagles.
“All of a sudden a producer says in my ear, ‘Hey, I need you to call somebody at halftime.’ I said, ‘What?’ He had never done that. He gave me a number and said, ‘It’s Andy Reid.’ ”
Aikman stepped out of the booth at halftime and called the Eagles’ coach, who explained the situation. He wanted Aikman to make a beeline for Philadelphia in hopes that he would be ready to play the following week, in a Monday night game at San Francisco.
Well, you know how the story ends. Aikmen didn’t come out of retirement and Reid now poaches ex-cons upon release from prison.
So the game of the week is the Packers-Vickings tilt, and as suspected Green Bay doesn’t know what to do with themselves. Do they clap or boo? They even went so far as to rename Minnesota Ave. to Aaron Rodgers Drive. Temporarily of course, because it’s not like Rodgers have saved lives or won a Super Bowl, or anything that would warrant a such a prestigious honor.
In my eyes, there’s no reason to boo Brett Favre because he wanted to stay and they pushed him out the door. So unless the fans pelt him with cheese cubes, I don’t see a story here. But maybe I’m wrong, maybe grown men in the stands will be moved to tears seeing the gunslinger bleeding purple.
So my recommendation is just to get shitfaced. I mean really, really, really shitfaced, because it makes it that much easier to pretend that Brett Favre isn’t being discussed while the Vikings defense is on the field.
When I think of motivational speeches, names like Lombardi and Knight come to mind. But now there’s one name that stands out above the rest…Ditka. After seeing this speech, I’ve never been so fired up to drop a spike. It’s 10 in the morning and I almost feel obligated to go eat two cheese steaks and drink eight cups of coffee so that I can make Coach proud.
P.S. Grabowski sucks at flushing.
Roger Goodell enjoyed a day in Washington, D.C. yesterday to learn about our government first hand. Goodell was there to discuss what was being done in regards to dealing with player concussions.
Let me read between the lines for you. Former players who are now pretty much disabled didn’t get paid shit when they were in the NFL. In the meantime current NFL players are making bank because the NFL has developed into a cash cow.
So in reality, this is not about preventing concussions or protecting brains from becoming mush. This is about trying to lay the ground work for a lawsuit so that these disabled players can cash in on the NFL money tree.
If you ask me, I’d rather see my tax money go towards a congressman having an affair with a stripper named Bunny. Because nothing can be done about concussions in football unless you remove the contact from the sport, and if you remove the contact from the sport, you’re left with a bunch of fat guys dancing with each other. I don’t know about you, but I’m not going to pay $165 to spend and afternoon watching the fat man ballet.
Hit it…
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Everyone’s favorite headless costume finally made it to the national news by way of the Today Show. The next step is to spin this costume into a sitcom. I don’t know about you, but I’d watch a headless version of Married With Children.
The plot lines would be endless. Like the time that Kelly stole Buds head out of the fridge and put it in the oven. Or the time that Peg wanted to buy a new dress, but didn’t have any money, so she sold Al’s head to medical research. Comedic gold I tell you.
Tampa is en route to a near perfect 3 win season and they’ve already started making moves on their roster. Probably the easiest cut they’ve made since returning from London is Marcus Johnson.
Police say they spotted Johnson asleep in his 2010 Chevrolet Impala at Dale Mabry Highway and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard about 4 a.m. today. A police lieutenant had to wake Johnson.
Johnson, 27, showed signs of impairment during field sobriety exercises and later refused to participate in breath tests.
That’s why the Bucs are struggling. Not only are their linemen too lazy to block, their even too lazy to take a field sobriety test.
P.S. Nothing says back-up linemen like a 2010 Cheverolet Impala.
It’s now official. The Tennessee Titans are now in 100% “oh shit we might not win a game this year” mode. The squad is only 0-6 and now owner Bud Adams is trying to get involved by demanding a quaterback change. To make matters worse, he even requested that they resign “that McNair guy”. Not really.
If there’s one thing that ruins football, it’s not guys doing stupid dances in the end zone. It’s owners getting involved with the starting line up. The NFL should have some sort of clause in the franchise agreement that bars the owner from telling a coach who to play. You see as the owner, you’re good for two things. Money and one speech at the Super Bowl if your team wins.
In: NFL
Did anyone happen to catch that scrimmage last night? Ya, the Eagles-Skins exhibition. That shit was hilarious. I can’t wait to see what these guys do when they put their starters out there for the regular season.
Oh wait, those were there starters? Get the fuck out. If that’s the case, then hook this guy up with a contract to play for the Skins because their line sucks. I figure if you’re that big and able to stand on your two feet without a crane, than you’re good enough to play for the Redskins.
